Adult Joke #1 : What a coincidence
The bartender served a woman a glass of orange juice.
The man sitting next to her, turned to her and said,
"This is a special day; I'm celebrating."
"I'm celebrating, too," she replied, clinking glasses with
him.
"What are you celebrating?" he asked.
"For years I've been trying to have a child," she answered.
"Today my gynecologist told me I'm pregnant!"
"Congratulations," the man said, lifting his glass.
"As it happens I'm a chicken farmer, and for years all my hens were
infertile. But today they're finally fertile."
"How did it happen?" asked the woman.
"I switched cocks." Said the man.
"What a coincidence!" she replied.
Adult Joke #2 : Speed limit of sex
Question What's the speed limit of sex?
Answer 68; at 69 you have to turn around
Adult Joke #3 : Three times are allowed
A priest was called away for an emergency. Not wanting to leave
the confessional unmanned, he called a rabbi friend up and asked
him to cover for him. The rabbi told him he wouldn't know what
to say, but the priest told him to come on over and he'd stay
with him and show him what to do. The rabbi comes and he and the
priest are in the confessional.
In a few minutes a woman comes in and says "Father forgive me
for I have sinned." The priest asks "What did you do?". The
woman says "I Committed adultery." Priest "How many times?"
Woman "Three times."
Priest "Say two Hail Mary's, put $5 in the box and go and sin
no more."
A few minutes later another woman enters the confessional. She
says "Father forgive me for I have sinned." Priest "What did
you do?"
Woman "I committed adultery." Priest "How many times?" Woman
"Three times." Priest "Say two Hail Mary's, put $5 in the box
and go and sin no more."
The rabbi tells the priest that he thinks he's got it so the
priest leaves.
A few minutes later another woman enters and says "Father
forgive me for I have sinned."
Rabbi "What did you do?" Woman "I committed adultery." Rabbi
"How many times?" Woman "Just once." Rabbi "Go do it two more
times. We have a special this week, three for $
5."
Adult Joke #4 : Surprise, surprise...
As I walked into my office, my secretary,
Janet, said, "Good morning
boss. Happy Birthday."
And I felt a little better;
someone had remembered.
I worked until noon.
Then, Janet knocked on my
door and said "You know, it's
such a beautiful day outside and it's your
birthday let's go to lunch,
just you and me."
I said, "By George, that's
the greatest thing I've heard
all day. Let's go." We went to lunch. We didn't
go where we normally
go; we went out to the country to a little private
place. We had two martinis
and enjoyed lunch tremendously.
On the way back to
the office, she said,
"You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't
need to go back to the office,
do we?"
I said, "No, I guess not." ;
She
said, "Let's go to my apartment."
After arriving at her apartment she said,
"Boss, if you do n't mind, I think
I'll go into the bedroom and slip into
something more comfortable."
"Sure!" I excitedly replied. She went into thebedroom
and, in about six
minutes, she came out carrying a big birthday cake,
followed by my wife, children,
and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy
Birthday.
And there I sat...on the couch..........NAKED
Adult Joke #5 : What's the difference between women of the ages 8, 18, 28, 38, 48, and 58 ?
8 - You take her to bed and tell her a story
18 - You tell her a story and take her to bed
28 - You don't need to tell her any story and take her to bed
38 - She tells you a story and takes you to bed
48 - You tell her a story to avoid going to bed
58 - You stay in bed all day to avoid her story
[ Top ] [ Next => ]
Do you have any adult jokes to share?
If yes, please email them to webmaster@adultshag.com with the subject title
"Adult jokes submission" . Thanks a million!
*NOTE: As far as we are aware, none of the above jokes are copy-righted. However, if you have reasons to believe otherwise, please email us and we will remove them if proven. Thanks.
Related resources:
[ Jokes pg 2 ]
[ Jokes pg 3 ]
[ Jokes pg 4 ]
[ Jokes pg 5 ]
[ Jokes pg 6 ]
[ Jokes pg 7 ]
[ Jokes pg 8 ]
[ Jokes pg 9]
[ Jokes pg 10 ]
[ Jokes pg 11 ]
[ Jokes pg 12 ]
| Love Articles
| Trade Links
| Contact Us
| Free Adult Ebooks
| Free Adult Jokes
| Sitemap
| Adult Entertainment Home
| Tell A Friend |
|
